Daily Shot – Pidgin Headlines with Humor

🌍 Daily Shot – Pidgin Headlines with Humor

📅 Monday, 08/09/2025
✍️ By: Prince O. D. Agbedeyi PhD

🔥 Politics & Government

  • Dangote vs NUPENG wahala: Union dey para say strike na sure bet, FG don rush call meeting. (E be like Dangote refinery go soon turn Nollywood set).

  • IPOB to FG: "Free Kanu sharp-sharp, no dey use our guy drag with Ekpa." (E don turn who be original, who be photocopy).

  • Governor Aiyedatiwa: "Make we unite fight terrorism." (Oga, we sef dey wait for you to show us weapon pass microphone).

💔 Security & Wahala

  • B’Haram attack again: 63 people don kpeme. (This one no be wahala again, na national breakfast).

  • Police yarn: 5 dead bodies for Lagos riverbank na cult wahala. (Cult don turn to swimming competition).

  • Kidnap gist: Hijab-wearing gunmen carry two people, but soldiers kpai Kogi bandit leader. (Na action film we dey watch everyday).

💡 Economy & Money Matter

  • Naira don flex small: Exchange rate don sweet small to ₦1,514 per dollar. (Naira dey gym, e don dey add muscle).

  • Customs gist: Duty-free import no go pass $300. (Abeg make person fit import Indomie at least).

  • CBN boss Cardoso: "We go continue to tighten economy belt." (Belt don tight sotey, e dey cut our waist).

👩🏽‍⚕️ Health & Education

  • Resident doctors dey vex: Strike dey load because promises still dey hang for air. (Our leaders dey use "Coming Soon" pass Nollywood trailer).

  • Schools resume: Children dey go back but parents pocket dey cry. (School fee na another Boko Haram).

🌍 International Gist

  • Trump warn Hamas: "Last warning don land." (Na like generator wey no dey off, always warning).

  • Egyptian tourist collapse for Abuja hotel. (Hotel buffet fit get strong juju o).

⚽ Sports

  • US Open final: Alcaraz flog Sinner, carry cup, come collect No.1 ranking back. (Sinner sin, Alcaraz win).

😂 Funny Extra

  • Oyo landlord wahala: Landlord fight tenant over rent, tenant kpeme. (This one na "Pay rent or die trying").

  • Man wey trek Lagos to Abakaliki: Governor reward am ₦10m. (Next week, boys go trek Lagos to Sokoto, just dey try your luck).

💡 Moral Lesson

Nigeria fit hard, wahala fit full everywhere, but as dem talk — "na who get strong leg dey waka reach market." No matter the palava, keep hope alive.

✅ Tags: #PidginHeadlines #GlobalEgberi #NigeriaNews #PrinceAgbedeyi

📌 Author: Prince O. D. Agbedeyi PhD
🌐 Website: Global Egberi Media International
📧 Email: globalegberimedia@gmail.com
📞 Nigeria: +234 813 490 2214


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"🔥 Daily Shot don land o! Dangote vs NUPENG drama, Naira dey gym, B’Haram no wan gree, doctors dey vex, and landlord matter turn Nollywood. 😂 Catch all d gist for Global Egberi Media International blog!"

 

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